Not last night, but the night before the night before the night before, those pesky witches were in our back garden, holding hands and chanting about the autumn solstice. There were candles and sparkles of magic in the darkness.

At that very moment, unbeknownst to the witches, I was having a television installed. Maybe the electricians offended them, but boy, things sure are starting off sucky this week.

Oh, ye witches, have mercy! I thought you were a lovely group. My back garden is your back garden, as we say in Spanish. I just really need things to be good for a little while.