Twang Twang Twang

Rob is out of town, and I keep seeing things in my peripheral vision, shadows slipping around corners or blurs darting past my feet. It is not Goblin Foo, who is oftentimes on my lap or elsewhere within my sight; it is ghosts, or gremlins, or my nerves twanging like guitar strings. The only thing is, my therapist told me yesterday that I’m not neurotic anymore. For someone who has eaten, breathed, and slept neuroses for as long as he can remember, this is a stunning blow. My nerves may be guitar strings, but they are apparently twanging a different tune these days.

I am also learning again how to knit. I learned once before, but I instantly forgot how. When Faustus came to town last weekend for Rob’s birthday, we only had a spare half hour, but during that time, he showed me again how to knit a scarf. Faustus is a talented teacher who patiently walked me through every contingency. Of course, the instant he left, my fledgling scarf became so hideously snarled that I had to unravel it and begin anew. Over the next three days, I started seven more scarves, the corpses of which now litter the living room floor. “This is not the activity for me,” I told Rob at last.

But last night, alone in the house and tired of seeing the shadowy figures dart through doorways when they thought I wasn’t looking, I decided to watch an episode of “Joan of Arcadia” on TiVo, in which god tells Joan that she should learn how to knit because it is the new yoga and because it focuses the mind. I fear “Joan of Arcardia” is jumping the shark, but it must still have power over me.

I am four inches into my latest scarf.

Comments

if you want to leave the scary shadows for say, an hour and a half...you may come to yoga with me :-)

Aw, the damn twanging. But knitting is soooo good - keep at it and you'll have a whole entire scarf in no time. And it will be cuddly, which is a good thing. I hope Goblin's well.

"Joan of Arcadia" may be jumping the shark, but did you hear Mark Burnett is creating a new reality show based on "Touched by an Angel"?

Since real angels demand too many perks, he's recruiting Roma Downey and Della Reese.

I'm so proud of you!

"From ghoulies and ghosties
and long-legged beasties,
And things that go bump in the night;
May the Good Lord deliver us"

An old Scots spell which never fails, I recommned that you try it.

I have a knitting book you could look at, if you like. Also, I can several types of scarf.
I hear that last week's Joan was C-R-A-Z-Y, and that all of a sudden it is like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, a show I'd never managed to care about.

Zenchick: Aren't you the best! Unfortunately, the scary shadows object when I get out of their sight for more than forty-five minutes. :)

Mushlette: The scarf is progressing, although my technique is slightly problematic. I have decided to alter my ambitions to include knitting a blanket.

Brian: While it would be nice for people to get the help they need, it's sad that the price is to be exploited as an emotional manipulation for the masses on network TV. That said, Della Reese can touch me anytime.

Faustus: Thank you. I am proud of me, too.

Hamish McGandalf: Funny, I was having tea with someone in London and offhandedly recited that spell under my breath, and he vanished in a puff of smoke. Or, well . . . I think he actually went into a tube station, but same difference, really.

Cara: Tragically, Joan is really jumping, jumping, jumping the shark with this new geek army conceit. It would have been less tragic if Lucy had turned out to be Lucifer. I hope I'm wrong. Also, I would love to borrow your knitting book. I need to find out how to make different-colored scarves and I also need to learn when to STOP making a scarf before it gets long enough to be a noose.

> Or, well . . . I think he actually went into a tube station, but same difference, really.

ROFLMAO!!!

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