05.05.2007
Satan of Nine
Why are four out of five episodes of “Star Trek: Voyager” about the Pretend Doctor getting kidnapped? He can’t stick his shiny head out the door of the Sick Bay without someone getting itchy fingers. “How is the Doctor going to get stolen this week?” is what people must have thought in the past. Also: “Why is that Borg wearing high heels?”
Last night, before picking Rob up at the train station, I carried a flaming sauce pan to the four corners of the house. It was filled with Epsom salt, rubbing alcohol, and fire. The point was to burn away bad energy, but I almost burned away my eyebrows, too. Get thee behind me, eyebrows.
posted by
David at 7:45 AM
Oh for! Did you have to walk in a special pattern between those four corners? A little pentagram or something? As the owner of a cursed piece of land, I can tell you that the fire won't help. Whiskey might.
posted by: Licketysplit on 05.05.2007 at 10:59 PM
Licketysplit: My pattern was waving the sauce pan around at arm's reach so my hair didn't catch on fire. I suppose it all depends upon what your land is cursed by, doesn't it. The chupacabra is on my side.
posted by:
David on 05.06.2007 at 1:33 PM
Rosemary smudgesticks work too.
The house ends up being cleansed and smelling like roasted chicken.
There's also no naked flame, so ultimately safer.
;)
posted by:
Craig on 05.06.2007 at 10:48 PM
Craig: That sounds like the difference between a flamethrower and a birthday candle. And I thought that sage was the thing to burn, not rosemary. It's a wonder there are any evil spirits in this house at all with all the cooking Rob does.
posted by:
David on 05.07.2007 at 10:04 AM
Doesn't that violate some kind of housing code? Honestly, I'd take the evil spirits over melted eyebrows.
Worst cherries flambé ever.
posted by:
Crash on 05.08.2007 at 6:38 PM
David: I agree that fashion should generally take precedence over comfort.
Crash: I just forgot to add the cherries, that's all.
posted by:
David on 05.09.2007 at 1:05 AM
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