Last night, I was tossing and turning when I started talking to the ghosts. I says to them, I says, “Your clomping around up there is not helping my insomnia”--this in reference to the multiple footsteps that creaked directly over my head. Even Goblin heard them, although they didn’t seem to bother her. When I’m actually on the third floor, the ghosts are as silent as a tomb, so I know they plan their activities accordingly. Maybe the supernatural aerobics class begins at 1:00 a.m. in Rob’s office.

There were also these weird knocking sounds. I said, “If this is a ghost, knock once for yes and twice for no.” Then came three knocks. So I changed tactics: “Knock two times for yes and three times for no.” Five knocks. Are they this indecisive all the time or is it just the house settling?

I said, “What is your name?”

“Harry,” it said. Or was it “Sharon”?

Waitaminute. “Clara?” I asked hopefully. That was the name of my grandmother, with whom I have been wanting to talk again.

“Under the bed,” came the response.

“Iiiiiiiiiii’m not comfortable with that." I gathered the covers around my chin.

“In your ear.”

The ghost and I simultaneously came to the conclusion that the conversation had lost its productivity and it went back upstairs. Maybe they make you sign up for aerobics classes in the afterlife, because I never would have thought of my grandmother Clara as the type when I knew her before.